Lately, I've been thinking about how entertaining at home used to be a regular part of social life, from casual cocktail parties to spontaneous evenings with friends and neighbors. Perhaps what our homes are missing isn't another beautiful piece of furniture, but more opportunities to connect. I'm exploring the return of in-person conversation, simple weekly get-togethers, and how creating intentional conversation spaces in our homes can help bring back a little more connection, community, and time together.
Recently, I read something very interesting that has been on my heart for some time. @bohemianfig wrote an Instagram post about bringing back cocktail parties. The post shared her experience of watching her parents throw cocktail parties in the 1970s as a child. She described people dressed beautifully, wonderful music, grown-ups having conversations, and everyone really enjoying connecting with others. She wrote about how getting together today feels more like a production and the challenge of everyone having a busy schedule.
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Even with today’s challenges, I am looking forward to a social shift. More face-to-face interactions, introducing people to one another not for networking purposes but for building meaningful relationships. Reading through the comments on her post shows how many people are feeling this way too. One comment that stood out to me was from @thecalmrebellion.co, who said they host a “midweek social” every Wednesday night from 6:30 pm- 8:30 pm.
Their friends have a standing invitation (without a formal guest list, RSVPs, or expectations) to drop by on their way home and enjoy an appetizer and a drink. There is no need to find the perfect date that matches everyone’s schedule; it's simply a pocket of time in the middle of an ordinary week where people can gather around the kitchen and enjoy each other’s company for however long they can stay.
I love an elaborate themed get-together, but the idea of a standing, open invitation to simply gather with friends, neighbors, and acquaintances in our homes one day a week sounds amazing. Sharing an appetizer or two with whatever you prefer to drink, whether it’s a cocktail, beer, a glass of wine, soda, or a non-alcoholic drink. Making plans is so much easier when there is no formal RSVP, and guests can show up when they can and stay as long as they like. Some weeks you can catch up with a few neighbors, and some weeks you can enjoy meeting someone new in a kitchen full of friends who wanted to shake up their usual routine.
Back in Oregon, I used to get together with some of our neighbors once a month. We had the best time, and I miss that connection dearly. When there is an opportunity to gather every week or month, if weekly is too much for your schedule, making plans becomes easy. There is no need to “prepare” a party every week; you are trying to create the habit of connecting, not add another responsibility to your plate.
Perhaps what our homes are missing isn’t another perfect piece of furniture or seasonal home decor; maybe it’s opportunities to gather and really connect. We could make getting together an ordinary part of our lives instead of waiting for a special occasion. Entertaining at home used to be a regular part of social life. A place where friendships with neighbors and acquaintances grew, creating a sense of community.
I have written many blog posts over the years about spaces that make planned or impromptu get-togethers even more possible; read them here, here, here, and here. I designed conversation rooms that don’t center around a TV and instead invite people to linger, talk, and really connect. These rooms aren’t just for parties; they go beyond that. It's an intimate space where you can reconnect with family, play board games with the kids without distraction, and read unhurriedly.
Throughout history, especially during the Victorian era, we see that an important part of the home was a front parlor. This was a dedicated room to entertain guests, often a formal space filled with the household’s finest furniture and decor. It was a room that wasn’t really utilized unless you had a visitor. I would encourage the daily use of a conversation room, the modern version of this space. It should be a place the family can gather in anytime and feel comfortable, as well as practical.
With larger living room spaces that most newer homes have, you don’t need a dedicated conversation room. Break up the living room into functional sections using rugs to define those spaces: a section of the room for TV viewing with a standard living room setup and an intimate seating area acting as a sort of lounge for having drinks or playing board games. Maybe you have a sunroom or unused formal dining room that would make the perfect spot to add a conversation seating arrangement. My favorite seating arrangement is four beautiful chairs that surround a round coffee table. This setup allows conversations to flow with each person seated so they can easily see everyone else.
Remember, our homes should be more than a pretty space. A cocktail party was the inspiration; a conversation area is the setting, and the real purpose is to share our lives with friends and family, creating lasting memories. Scroll all the way down for my tips on hosting and creating atmosphere without pressure, plus cocktail and mocktail inspiration.
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Checkout my Pinterest page for cocktails and mocktail ideas!
My tips for hosting and creating atmosphere without pressure
Add soft, warm lighting with table lamps, candles, or dimmer switches for overhead lights.
Have a bar cart or cabinet stocked with everything you need for a drink station so friends can serve themselves.
Don’t serve a full meal! Keep a selection of store-bought appetizers, charcuterie, or desserts in your pantry or freezer, so you pull out one or two things to nibble on. Don’t overthink this; everyone is happy with crackers, cheese, and fruit!
Have music playing to help people feel comfortable.
Don’t worry about a perfectly styled home. I always like to have a vase of fresh flowers or greenery. Even a cutting from your yard counts!
Gathering should be open-ended within a reasonable timeframe and encourage friends to bring a guest.
Lately, I've been thinking about how entertaining at home used to be a regular part of social life, from casual cocktail parties to spontaneous evenings with friends and neighbors. Perhaps what our homes are missing isn't another beautiful piece of furniture, but more opportunities to connect. I'm exploring the return of in-person conversation, simple weekly get-togethers, and how creating intentional conversation spaces in our homes can help bring back a little more connection, community, and time together.